Instead of taking off our pants, let's just start by being friends!

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#CatLover#MovieAfficionado#Cuddler#AnakRantau

Location

  Schönaich, Germany  [ show map ][ hide map ]

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I'm here to

I'm here to meet girls 18 to 47 years old for dating, friendship, serious relationship and networking.

About me

My name is Florian, I'm 38. I'm looking for a life partner. To me, life partner means an EQUAL partner. That means I expect this person to put in the same effort I put into a relationship. If I save hard to visit you, I expect you to do the same thing(within your means). If I make an effort to be with you, I hope so would you. I expect that because I believe that humans are, in their nature, selfish creatures. We do things not because we are so kind, but because we get something in return. Even if we donate money or help others, we get something (like a good feeling). That is not necessarily bad, it's just something I think we have to understand and accept about how the human mind works.

Now, if we talk about relationships, which relationship will probably last? The one where someone has to give almost nothing to receive a lot? Or the one where both partners give something and thus create a future together?

I believe that love is unconditional. And I noticed that most girls seem to disagree with that. They might expect the guy to love her unconditionally(with wrinkles, extra kilos, etc.), but aren't willing to make compromises on their part. Does that seem fair to you? I think it isn't asking too much or being unfair to just ask for the same thing. Men are just as hurt of rejection or failure and have fears or traumas too. I don't think the genders should fight as much as they do and I think it is sad how many people seem to see relationships as a game or power struggle.

My grandparents married in the 50's. This was a time when a man could feed his whole family on one income(not like today). Yet, my grandma still worked, because she had two children. She said "I knew that by having children, I had to sacrifice something for it" (in this case money, getting a job, etc). She didn't work full time(for some years she did), her income was smaller. But she worked. My grandpa and her put their money together(the same percentage), but also had their own money. They bought their apartment together. And it worked well. They've been married for over 65 years.

Now I don't quite understand why in todays world where we are taught that women are strong and independent and can do anything a man can do seem to be so conservative. I don't say that it's per se bad if a woman wants a guy to pay all the bills and give more than she gives him(although I pity the guy). But if it was roles reversed, would a woman want a guy who wants to live off of her and doesn't want to fully commit?

I'm 37 now. I work, but I also had times when I didn't have a job. I'm suffering from clinical depression. I also seem to slowly go bald(although I might get lucky and not lose everything). I'm far from perfect. I'm too sensitive maybe. I can be scatterbrained. But I'm also caring, devoted and sincere. I'm honest. I don't believe in mind games. If I'm with someone, I will always share how I feel and I hope my partner sees that as an invitation to share with me too(that's how you get to know each other and create real intimacy).

I'm working as a freelancer, which gives me some flexibility and more free time than others, but also a less dependable income (although it also means it can be higher than last month).
I'm putting away money for my retirement every month to have a safety net. I also stand to inherit a house and a few square kilometers of land.
So to me, money isn't everything. I'd definitely pick love over money. I used to think that women prefer that too when push comes to shove, but now I'm not so sure anymore. . If the only way for me to be with a girl is to have a certain income to be „loved“, I'd rather be alone.

PS: Some people asked me about my shirt. Yes, it's from Indonesia, I have lived there and visited many times. Also been to Japan and Singapore a couple of times and I'm currently thinking about moving back to Asia/Indonesia in 2022.

About you

What would you get if you'd choose someone like me?

Well, I'm definitely a guy with a lot of empathy. I'm very honest and hate unfair behavior. I definitely have a plan for the future and don't intend to be homeless or live in the gutter or something. I won't be the kind of guy who'll give you 1000$ a month for shopping or goes on fancy trips every 2 months, but I'm also not someone who never gets something for his partner. I love to give my partner gifts if I love them. And of course I'd want to make sure they're taken care of. But I(and I think women too) want to feel emotionally secure. That if I marry you or we live together, we both really try super hard to make it work. And again, I mean REALLY hard! Maybe if need be, even go through a few hard years to make it work. Because I think that's how it is in life. Couples have rough times, but if you build a life together and don't just get most of the things because someone else got them for you, I think you'll fight harder for it. And I do believe "For BETTER or WORSE!".

So what kind of person are you? Do you know what you want? Do you have a plan? For all the things you want in life, do you plan to rely on others? Get them yourself? As a team? Are you someone who easily replaces things (shoes, phones) or keeps using them for a long time?

Life is a lot more fun and more fulfilling together. And you don't need huge wealth for that. Family and love make you(at least me) happier than money(in my experience). And if you're looking for someone who won't lose his feelings for you when your hair turns grey or you might go blind or lose a limb, I'm that kind of person. Because I think we love someone for who they are on the inside and for how they treat us. But if we know that this person only „loves“ us if certain conditions are met, I think I'd rather be alone. Not only does it not seem to add anything for me, it just seems to lead to heartache and suffering.

This is my idea of love:
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Physically, I really love brown/dark eyes and brown/dark hair. I think brown eyes are so beautiful, so if you have brown eyes, don't wear contact lenses^^!
I also think cute beats s#xy. I love the 60s style, pink or purple or yellow colours on girls, cute polka dot dresses, etc.

I like women who are mature, rational, humble, caring and family-oriented. Intelligence is always a plus. It would be nice if you enjoy watching all kind of different movies or tv series, reading books, cooking together, cuddling and sweet gestures. Also, you should be open to move to a different country together (I assume we won't live in the same country and I'm planning to leave mine anyway as I don't see a future here). I personally think about moving to South East Asia because the living standard is nice and for the same amount of money that it takes for me to have a simple life here, I can have a king's life there.

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